The Secret to Life Part 3

I try really hard to take good care of my nails, I do them every week and try to get a gel manicure at least once a month to give them a chance to grow. When I break a nail or the polish chip I hate it, I hid my hands or peel all the polish off until I can do them again.

This is one of the things I hate the most, I also hate when people don’t realize how short and fleeting life is. In order to keep this post from being sentimental I’ll just dive right in.

I don’t know who told everyone that in order to be a functional person you had to have your first boyfriend in High School, break up with him in college for a few years of partying, finally meet someone your junior year, fall madly in love only to break up again after graduation, have a few more year of craziness, find a 9-5, go to happy on Thursdays, get shitty on Saturdays and spend your Sunday’s recovering, hate your job, struggle continuously until your late 20’s when you finally stable out, advance in your job to make a stable salary. Finally you’ll meet the man of your dreams, fall in love, have kids and at last find your happiness in your husband, your family and your stability.

What a load of shit.

Some of us are on the express train in life, with limited stops while other are on the local train with delays. Either way, we all get to the same place, some of us just have a little more time to enjoy the view than others.


The Secret to Life p2.

When you’re in high school, college or a recent graduate and someone asks you “so what do you want to do” and you “answer I don’t know” more than likely they will say “oh well that’s no problem”

About that. It actually is a problem.

Por ejemplo: Lets say Jane wants to go into journalism, in high school she would work on the school paper, in college she would write for the campus new station and after graduation she would work for her local paper or better yet move away to some small town to get her start. Now lets say Jane doesn’t discover this passion of hers until later in life, say her junior year of college. She tries to join the school newspaper but since shes new she has to go through an entire 9 months of training and doesn’t get a chance to start writing until the end of her junior year/beginning on senior year – which by the way is the time in your life when you are out job hustling.

Now of course this doesn’t apply to you if you are a business major, an accounting person, a scientist or maybe a developer, a teacher. But for all of you out there who are not left brained, it’s a problem. You need to know what you want to do and you need to know early, you need to work at it, you need to hone it and you need to believe it. People will tell you “you don’t need to worry about it, you can figure it out later”, but why? Why put off what the inevitable? why wait to pursue your passion until after you graduate from college? or even from high school? why not figure out what it is and pursue it. Pursue it so you’re not playing catch up your first few years out of college. Pursue it so you don’t end up like me.

The secret to life

Everything you’ve been told is a lie.

Let me explain.

I am *tear* 24 years old, finally moved out on my own and working *another tear* a real persons job. Not one day goes by when I think about my SAT scores, GPA, extracurricular activities or AP classes (I took 2). Not another day goes by where my employers have ever asked or cared about my GPA, extracurricular activities or AP classes. Do you want to know why? because it doesn’t matter. That C+ I got in Math my freshman year? whatever. That one time I cheated on my psychology exam?  unnecessary because in retrospect that class didn’t matter. The time I looked at my yellow crayon in 2nd grade because I couldn’t remember how to spell yellow! (I’m a bad speller) it was not important and  it didn’t matter

None of it did. What matters was the nights I spent not studying and hanging out with my friends, the one time we snuck out on our roof and drank all night, or the time we stayed out till the sun rose dancing at a bar, the times I would spend my last quarters buying a chicken roll because I just couldn’t live without (see I still remember?) These are the things that are important, these are the things you remember long after graduation, these are the stories you tell your co-workers when you’re eating lunch, and these are the types of experiences that make you a functional and whole human being, the things that your employers can see and let them know you’ll be a good fit in their company.

This is the secret to life…part 1.

Stop asking me if I like white guys

Here is something I’ve heard twenty three times too many over the past four years.

This pisses me off for several reasons. Firstly, in defense of all the white boys out there, don’t make them seem like they are some alien creatures, although some of them may be (I joke). They are men just like all the other men.

Secondly, don’t make it seem like it takes a certain type of black girl to be attracted to a white guy. An attractive man is an attractive ass man no matter what color he is — he’s just good looking, and call me crazy but I like myself a good-looking man.

Sometimes my friends will turn to me and be like, “Oh yeah, but you like white guys, right?” as if to say I have an exclusive contract with the White Men of America Inc. where I am only allowed to be attracted to those of a certain European descent.

Now let me tell you something that many of you can relate to: at an institute of higher learning, in the northeast region of the United States, our numbers drop DRASTICALLY. I’m talking ‘I can count the number of brothers on my own hands’ drop. Pickings are slim and slim are the pickings, and if you want to be a gold member of the BBC let me tell you something, video honey, you’re gonna have to take a number and wait in line.

I digress.

What I am saying is, a girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do, so excuse me if at times I walk out of the dark and into the light (hardy har).


What I’m trying to say is this: stop making me feel weird about myself when I say I think a guy is cute, and if he happens to be white don’t make it seem like I have some weird thing for white guys. FYI I have a thing for all guys. #blackgirlproblems